The Trumpet shall sound

I, for one, am all too familiar with the position Mr.Trump has found himself in.

You know, the one where you trawl through job listings on Monster, Gumtree, FAS (or whatever that pile of crap is called now) and convince yourself  “yeah! yeah, I could do that job”.

So you lather up the ‘aul CV with a load of shite and half truths, fire it into the HR department, then sit there with a big grin on your Chevy Chase thinking “thats never going to float”.

Two weeks pass and you get the call:  “Mr.__EEJIT__, We would like to invite you in for an interview. Your CV is outstanding and we think you would be a perfect fit for this role. In fact, you are so perfect we want to give you a raise already..” – Ah Bollox…

First day…

So you start your first day and sit there puce-red in the face like the big feckin’ eejit that you are.

Not knowing your arse from your elbow and relying on some sound colleagues (if your lucky) to help you out. But hey, fake it till you make it and if you last long enough you’ll probably scrape by, either that or you will be sacked within a month.

However, when one is the next leader of the “free world” faking it till you make it may not be the smartest or best option, especially when you are a bit of a gobshite. But as I said you may find yourself with a sound colleague, who knows their shit, whose willing to lend a helping hand.

Enter everybody whose-not-an-idiot’s favourite president. Barack Obama.

Barack being the sound chap that he is, has written a Dummies Guide to being president for The Donald so that he doesn’t get his sticky little yellow fingers into trouble when it comes to matters of warfare and national security. The Washington Post reported:

“On the eve of a new administration that has promised more aggressive counterterrorism operations, the Obama White House has released a lengthy compendium of its own policies governing the use of force.

The 61-page document outlines eight years of the administration’s legal opinions, executive orders and military directives. In a strong defence of the administration’s actions, it lists rules for lethal drones and terrorist detention, and describes the international and domestic law that undergirds them.”

In the introduction of the guidebook, Obama said he’d created it to reduce “the risk of an ill-considered decision” — an obvious observation of Trump’s lack of emotional stability and impulsive, erratic behaviour.

And then he wrote something that Trump will REALLY hate when he said it was critical to give “as much information as possible to the public…so that an informed public can scrutinise our actions and hold us to account.”

Good luck Donald, you crazy bastard you.